Meet Winnie

You might remember a post about a month or so ago where I mentioned that Nathan had a seed of an idea planted in his mind by some missionary friends.  That idea was to travel in an RV while we do deputation over the course of next year. As homeschooling parents, our friends had expressed the difficulty of doing school each day in a different place.  One day at a library, the next day at a home, the day after that at a fast food restaurant... (you get the idea).  Then, when one of their children had a meltdown (usually from the stress of frequent transition, something we had little difficulty envisioning happening with our Els), often the only private place they could find to retreat would be a bathroom.

Add to that, the cost savings of having a place to sleep, a place to make simple meals, a place to 'spread out' all the while traveling with a little boy in the midst of potty training (with short legs, mind you -- there are some challenges to which we still haven't figured out solutions) ... it seemed ideal for our family at this particular stage in life.

After doing a little bit of preliminary searching, I quickly dismissed the idea of traveling in an RV as a pipe dream because the only way we could afford such a vehicle would be if God literally dropped it in our lap.  About a month after sharing this idea with a very few close friends and family, we get a phone call from my parents.  Driving through Green Valley, they took a street they had never been on before and guess what they found in a driveway at the dead end?  An RV for sale!  And the price was within our meager budget!  They sent us photos and we pondered it for a couple of weeks, mulling over the decision of purchasing a vehicle that was older than the students who had just graduated from Asbury.

It had a few things going for it besides the price tag... The interior appeared to be in excellent condition.  The mileage was a mere 69,000 miles (not bad for a 1985!) and the engine was diesel (which, when made in that era, tends to last much longer than their gasoline equivalents).  Nevertheless, wanting to be good stewards of the little bit of savings we had, we debated and waited.

Then in early June we had our meeting with the team at Cincinnati Childrens about creating strategies for working with Ellie and all of a sudden, the decision to purchase the Winnebego was a no-brainer.  We gave the green light to my parents and a few weeks ago they drove it down the road to their home.  Tonight we got a phone call that she's been all tuned up:  new fuel pump, new wipers, new belts, new AC... She's been declared road worthy!

So, as we begin planning our months of homeland ministry assignment, we have an extra measure of excitement and a little less concern as we see how God is taking care of details like a cozy home-on-wheels where we can drive and sleep and eat and do school, regardless of which state we happen to find ourselves in!

Meeting 'old' friends...

One of the really cool blessings about walking the path of adoption are the wonderful families one gets to meet along the way.  I want to say it was sometime in 2009 I 'met' Jennifer Santor via e-mail as someone whose family was contemplating adopting from the Bethany-Albania program. (Was that through Katie Baron, whom [ahem] I've yet to meet in real life, either?).  We discovered we had a lot in common (where to begin?), and thanks to the blogosphere, we 'followed' each other's families as within months of each other we brought home sons from Eastern Europe (due to the Bethany-Albania program closing, the Lord directed them to Bulgaria where they found their son, Andrew).

Having participated in a pretty amazing Bulgarian-adoptive families get together in Cincinnati this past weekend, the Santor family pre-arranged to stop by and meet us on their way home to Georgia. Under almost any other circumstance, it might sound totally strange to have folks over for supper whom you've never met before in person.  But this isn't the first time we've done this (e.g. Diana N and Lindsey C!) and it was a real treat to fill in some gaps and talk about all those things that don't make it on the blog.  By the end of the evening we were making tentative plans to visit their home sometime next year!

Thanks, Santors, for veering off the interstate to come down to Wilmore!  We appreciate your love for the Lord, your heart for missions and orphans, and the testimony of your family! So cool that we can be 'real' friends now! ;-)

It's beginning to look a lot like...

Guess what got knocked off the dresser?  And guess what someone found?  And just HAD to empty!

Yep, those eyes know they probably are in trouble...

..but when confronted later by Daddy a certain little boy said, "I sorry. Mommy already took my picture."
I'm afraid I might have sent a mixed message.  What do you think?

At least his room smells REALLY good!
Below... tonight Nathan and Els joined a bunch of Dads from church at a Cincinn@ti Reds game.  I got a phone call about an hour ago from Nathan at the stadium.  We had debated about whether to get her a t-shirt or a cap for her souvenir.  Upon arrival she wanted neither.  The phone call was a beleaguered dad who knew it would be a long night until a certain girl got what she wanted... .... .... a giant foam finger.  I told him it would make for a good photo, so 'yes.' Buy it.  Photo forthcoming.

on their way out the door to the game...

The Loss of a Village Friend

The photo above is one of our all-time favorite images of Ellie in Albania.  This is typical of how our kids open doors and make us welcome guests wherever we go there.  We're re-posting it today to acknowledge the passing of a matriarch in our Albanian 'home town' of Vlashaj.  My mother, Sarah, is presently in Albania and was able on Friday to attend the funeral of the one whom Nathan and I know best as Anselmo and Ada's grandmother.  We are grateful that she had the opportunity to hear about Jesus through my parents, her grandchildren, and our colleagues, Genti and Shpresa, but only God knows her heart.  Times like this make us long for the day when we can be just down the street from our friends to share their sorrows as well as their joys, and tell other grandmas about One who wants to welcome them into eternal life after this one.

July 2010

Photo by Ellie

Reworking and Finetuning

If you're like me, you might be reading this post on Google Reader, or maybe you've signed up to have our posts delivered to your e-mail box via Feedburner.  If so, then you haven't visited our actual blog page in a while to see some of the changes that have slowly transpired on our little corner of the web.

The first change this spring has been the addition of pages to make it easy to find information about us in one place, if you're seeking it.  For example, if you want to know about the timeline related to our transition and move (or just exactly what we're going to do in Albania), go to the page "Our Move to Albania".  If you want to know more about adoption or find resources for families of children with limb differences, go to our "Resources and Links" page...

If you just learned that you can have our posts e-mailed to you and don't want to have to fool with things like RSS feeds, bookmarks, or Google Reader pages, put your e-mail address in the box to the right (see below).

We also send more ministry-specific updates out to those of you who are interested in that part of our lives.  Sign up for our newsletter and customize your subscription to receive as much or as little information as you want to stay up to date on the work in Albania.  We send out weekly prayer updates to our prayer team as well as monthly and quarterly reports.  Some information just isn't appropriate to post for posterity on the blog, but we can share it via e-mail. Thank you to those of you who have chosen to be a part of sending us and participating in the ministry with your prayers!  There will be much to report in the coming days so we want to make sure we stay connected in the mist of much transition on our part.

Our week...

... has pretty much consisted of sorting papers, organizing boxes, and filling trash cans.  And yes, we kept the  blinds closed on Tuesday morning until the garbage truck had come and gone.  It was that bad.

Ellie's Birthday

We are in full packing mode this week!  So much to do, but not too busy to report the celebration our girl's 7th birthday last week! Apparently, in Ellie's unique way of understanding the world, she believed on her birthday she would wake up with an entirely new set of skills that she couldn't undertake when she was six.  After all, one cannot drive a car until they're 16, right? Do you see her logic?  So, when Ellie turned 7, she believed she would be able to do things like write fast and juggle (not at the same time, of course).  Alas, my sweet Els, most of us must practice, practice before we are proficient at anything...

To make her feel special, I made a bunch of signs which I hung around the house with special messages.  She loved it more than I expected, though the sign in the bathroom literally made her gasp in surprise (not from the message, mind you).  I love that my kids love surprises!

On the morning of her birthday we took Ellie, Reni, and their friends Chloe and Essie to a bounce house in Lexington.

  The slide above was their favorite.  I caught sight of them holding hands lots of times.  Oh my... Ellie's going to miss them!

Nathan discovered that the cotton candy machine had a dollar credit already loaded in it, so for another buck, the kids split a delicious treat...

After lunch at Chick Fil A and a shopping trip at the Dollar Tree (Ellie promised the girls goodie bags when we picked them up -- OOPS! -- everyone got $3 to fill their own 'goodie bag' and had as much fun shopping as they did at the bounce house, and for a lot less!), we went home for cake and gifts.

 Do you remember last year's lanterns?  We didn't launch them all last year, and had kept a few for later (which survived getting packed up in a box).  Our friend Sarah happened to be in the center later that evening and accompanied us across the street to send off a few more.

All in all, I think Ellie had a great birthday.  I know I had a good time watching her enjoy the company of friends and seeing what a beautiful girl she is growing up to be!  Ellie, we love you SO much and are so proud of how much you've matured this year.  We love your concern for others and your encouraging heart. We can't wait to see what changes this year brings... just think what we may be doing a year from now!

VBS!

To say that I enjoyed VBS as a child is an understatement.  When I was too old to attend as a participant, I can't remember exactly, but I think I volunteered nearly every year until I went to college.  Pam visiting me from Scotland?  No biggie, we'll do VBS while she's in town!  So when my friend Ruth offered to escort Ellie so she could attend VBS at her church (Wilmore Free Methodist), I was so excited for Ellie to get to experience something I had enjoyed so much as a child!  (Our church does Winshape all-day camp, not VBS).

Ruth and Ellie

 The national park theme was executed unbelievably!  Every day we went to pick up Ellie, Reni begged to come along (he also begged to stay, too -- kinda sad) so he could see the animals.

The music room... (there was also a 'cave' room, and a 'fireside' room, among many others).

Sunday night we attended the weeks' final celebration night.  Ellie was SO excited to perform, before we arrived, she asked if she'd get to hold a microphone.  No, we do not watch those singing competition shows on TV.

Um, yes, I realize now that she may have outgrown these clothes.

 I love the look of intensity on her face below!  It was so neat to see her singing so enthusiastically.  And if she didn't know the words, she kept right up with the actions!

Now, as Ellie jumps on her trampoline, we hear a lot of, "It's gonna be a cool, cool summer!  Learning to trust in Jesus!..."  I can't tell you how that makes my heart smile!

Cell Phone Dump ... Oldies but Goodies

While I got a new phone over 7 months ago, I never took the photos and videos off my old phone until now.  Thought I'd share some photo gems I found (in between a lot of blurry images taken by Ellie)...

Watch the video below til the end... (waiting for Nonna and PaPa to arrive for a weekend visit) some things just don't wait. March 5, 2010.

Waiting to board our flight from Lexington to Reagan National... on our way to meet Reni!  6/28/2010, 6:28AM

Jet-lagged and obviously HOT .. Ellie was pretty much unresponsive once she got horizontal here on Jan's couch during our long layover coming home from Albania, August 5, 2010, 8:03PM (below).  That was a trip I'll never forget!

Always a cutie... home less than 2 weeks, catching a ride on the vac (9/2/2010).

First visit to the public pool.  Evidently very tiring!  9/6/2010

Digging these shopping carts at Krogers!  Little did we know how long the car obsession would last!  9/19/2010

Skipping ahead 6 months... outside the Ohio Theater on a Girls Only excursion with Nonna to see Mary Poppins! 4/23/2011

This I just don't get... the girl who can be afraid of EVERYTHING was more than happy to hold this on her lap.  The video below may be a big surprise to Ellie's grandma's... and no, it is NOT our snake. 9/26/2010

June visit to Cincy

Today we had another meeting with Ellie's team up at Cincinnati Childrens...

She positively squealed with delight when she saw her 'examining room' -- a large sensory room full of every kind of crash pad and cushion you can imagine plus a giant platform swing in the middle, where she laid on her stomach and 'flew like a bird' for several minutes.

While Ellie played, we discussed the areas that we wanted to work on and the team gave us some strategies and tips for success.  I share them here as much for my own memory and to serve as a development marker as anything else. It's certainly not a criticism of our daughter or indication of any kind of 'disappointment' in her.  As we were reminded again today, while she lay confined in an orphanage crib for nearly 18 months, the brains of babies with primary caregivers were actively integrating their central nervous system through touch, rocks, strokes, pats, walks, and more.  Ellie was severely deprived of this in nearly every way imaginable.  And probably then some that we haven't thought of.

A new description I heard today was "under responsive."  While we subconsciously process where we are in our environment through a variety of sensory inputs (our inner ear for balance, or the feeling of pressure under our feet when we're standing on the ground, for example), Ellie has to seek it out extra hard to feel her body in the same space.  Even her loud voice which I feel like I'm repeatedly chiding her for (which they called a 'lack of vocal control') can be explained by this.  And given that she has a high need to 'feel', it's incumbent upon us to provide her with what she needs to properly soothe herself and meet that need.  Already we have an exercise ball that she frequently sits on when she's watching TV.  We have a trampoline in the living room that's not exactly an attractive accessory to our decor (and also the source of much bickering between my children) but always accessible to her, and we know that her desire to push the shopping cart or pull Reni in the wagon is extremely relaxing and 'centering' as well.  Heavy bedding helps her sleep more soundly. Now, if we could only convince her how much she'd enjoy carrying in the groceries! Just kidding, of course. ;-) We were encouraged by the OT today that we're on the right track and Ellie is obviously learning what she can do on her own to stay relatively even keel (this is huge!).

In addition to continuing with those tools, we were also encouraged to ramp up our use of visual aides for helping her anticipate the day's schedule and the transitions coming ahead.  [This is a BIGGIE especially given what the next year or so of our family's life will look like as we travel to share about Albania around the country. Nathan has been looking extra hard for a small RV that we could use as our 'constant' home base so that she/we are not sleeping in a different bed every other night, thereby mitigating some of the stress of transition].  The example the OT gave us was the use of agendas at all-day conferences.  How many of us live and die by the presence of the conference schedule to know when breaks or mealtimes are coming and what time sessions end?  When we don't know that basic information, our focus suffers and we are pretty much  miserable.  While we have been intentional each night to verbally lay out the next day's plans to Ellie, I think a visual chart will also be very helpful - one that incorporate images as well as words, now that her reading is really picking up.  What's funny is to see how Reni has cued in on our evening run through and repeats to himself and to Ellie a lot of what we say, impressing it on his memory.

Yes, that little guy was hiding under her shirt hem, hence the uproarious laughter and giggles at her little friend's 'secret hiding place' in the photos.

The final new piece I'll share here was the use of "social stories" as a means of helping her make up some distance in her social skills.  This was interesting and exciting to us because it gives us a specific tool to work on with Ellie, and serves as a reminder that appropriate responses can be taught if we take the time to be intentional in teaching her.  From what I understand, a social story is presenting a particular situation (like attending a birthday party or meeting a new person), and talking through the appropriate ways to interact and respond within her abilities.  There are even groups of parents and kids that meet to work on improving social skills together.  The speech therapist was particularly helpful here and gave us some more visual tools to work on with Ellie (which I think will be much more effective than our words alone). There was probably a lot more, but I'll rely on their written reports to jog my memory.

In the past year, we feel like we've seen her take more strides, and her meltdowns have been fewer and further between, almost to the point of making me wonder if today's appointment would be that enlightening.  It's hard to know what specifically to attribute that to (maturity, environment, security, or all of the above?), but we really believe that homeschooling was a key piece and has been the right choice for her.  We are so thankful that it's an option and we plan to continue it next year!  To reiterate what I shared above, this is my way of processing what I've learned and if it helps someone else, all the better!  Take care!

Help me choose...

So for more than a month I've needed to photograph Ellie and Reni for the A Caring Touch Pediatrics 2012 wall display... Given that I had an offer from Caitlin to help me photograph the kiddos this afternoon, we took advantage of her and the dreamy weather and drove across the street to the University's semi-circle to finally "snap a few pics."  The first two are my favorites, but I can't decide which I like better!  Any thoughts?

I was SO sad that the sun went behind a cloud for most in the next series, after I finally got them settled down and cooperating again... and that even with Caitlin's help I couldn't both direct them into the right positions and take the photos at the same time (I was shooting on my stomach to be nice and low)!  For a boy with no feet, Reni doesn't stay in the same place very long!

Here's one with the sun:

Then it's gone... see what a difference?

By this point in time... they were done for!  But all in all, I thought this year was much easier than last!

In keeping with the fun of "Sunday Snapshot", I'll share a bit about I how took these images... they were shot on a Canon 5D Mark II, 70-200mm 2.8 lens.  I positioned the kids with their backs to the sun to provide a nice rim light (it's so much more interesting and dramatic!). My camera was set to 200 ISO, f-stop of 5.6, at 1/200 of a second, using an off-camera flash at 1/4 power with umbrella to provide fill light (fired using Pocket Wizards).  To finish the images, I added vignetting in Lightroom and ran a skin retouching filter in Photoshop to even out their skin and cover up some mosquito bites (removed some marker on Reni's hand with the patch tool) and sharpened their eyes with a Pioneer Woman free action.  Whew!