Update on Ellie's First Day of School

Here's Nathan asking my approval of Reni's "going home" outfit from the orphanage

I wasn't intending to post anything today, but I've gotten so many questions about Ellie's first day of school (including one from my sister just a minute ago), that I felt I should stick something up on the blog real quick.

I got Ellie on the bus and avoided jumping in the shower for the next hour just to make sure I wasn't called in to come pick her up or try to come in and calm her down. The phone remained silent so I went about the rest of my morning. I even enjoyed the special treat of a lunch out with my friend, Amy Kinnell.

Amy and her husband, Matt, are parents to two of Ellie's best friends: Chloe and Essie. Our families are bonded over adoption and parenting little girls. Amy and I happen to be in a unique club this week: both of us have husbands across the Atlantic Ocean working to bring boys home AND we both sent our girls off to Kindergarten this morning at JELV (in fact, our girls are in the same pod). I mentioned at our adoption group Monday night that while in Albania I had been craving the Bonzai burger from Red Robin (which she had originally recommended to me) and she suggested we go out for lunch. While at lunch she got a text from Matt that the boys were really struggling their first night with him (many tears) and then Nathan called me via Skype to let me know that Reni's passport was delayed and he was going to have to mentally rev himself up for yet another night in the hotel. It was kind of a helpless feeling that we couldn't do anything but offer moral support...while trying to enjoy a good burger. Maybe we should have waited for that lunch until they were back? After discussing schedules (which include many post-adoption medical appointments), I think it may have been a while before we could have found the time to do something like that any time soon.

Before I knew it, it was time to pick Ellie up from school. I joined a group of other parents waiting in the school's cafeteria. It wasn't long before Ellie's class walked in (she was at the head of the line). She looked a little pale, but otherwise her usual self. When she started talking I noticed she was hoarse. I asked her if she cried. She said, "No" (which I knew wasn't true).

Then she said (VERBATIM) in a tone of voice that indicated she wanted to elicit a smile or a laugh, "But I tried to throw my shoes out the window!"

The teacher nodded with her eyes down. I wanted to crawl under that tiny cafeteria table or click my heels and turn back time to start the day over.

Somehow I still found myself asking a question I already knew the answer to: "How was today?"

Her teacher responded, "It was rough. It was very rough."

She went on to say that the bus was VERY warm and Ellie arrived at school soaked with sweat. Then the day went on with good moments and difficult moments periodically. She said that a lot of time was spent on identifying boundaries -- which accounted for Ellie's comment that the teacher told her, "Don't touch the papers!"

One positive aspect was that Ellie brought home a paper with a poem telling about the book they read, "The Kissing Hand" --which just happened to be the book that Nonna and sent Ellie the day before school started. It's about a little raccoon starting school and how his momma prepared him to be brave for something so new and foreign. I had read it to Ellie on Tuesday night and she LOVED it. It looks like Nonna and Mrs. B are on the same wavelength when it comes to children's literature. Very cool!

This morning Ellie and I got up without too much difficulty and I dressed her in a tank top and shorts, hoping that it might be much cooler for the school bus. From what I could tell through the windows, she looked like she was struggling to keep her composure, but brightened when I remembered Nathan's little sign of encouragement that she liked (giving her two wiggling thumbs up). I felt a little goofy with a line of cars waiting in either direction, but then I didn't really care. It was definitely a lot better than yesterday!

After some discussion on Skype last night with Nathan, I think we're going to try driving her to school in the morning and letting her ride the bus home, if the ride's not too long. Okay -- I need to hustle. Lots to do to prepare for a family reunion coming to Wilmore this weekend! Yay! Can't wait to see my family!

Wednesday update for Elbasan

I am writing this from an internet cafe about a half mile from my hotel. The internet has been out all day, so in order to find out about Ellie's first day of school, I made the trek. I can't figure out this keyboard though, so there won't be quotation marks and maybe some other punctuations. I also have a few short videos to post, but they will have to wait until the internet is back at the Hotel Univers - that is really how it is spelled, it is not a typo.

I learned today that Reni's passport won't be done until Friday, so that is the earliest I will be able to take Reni. We are still hopeful that the court papers will be done tomorrow, so if you could pray at 1:00 pm our time - 7:00 am EST that is when Sister Rosita and I will be going to the courthouse to request the papers.

This morning I tried to calculate my expected expenses while here in Elbasan, and decided that I needed to exchange some more money. My Albanian is limited enough that trying to tell the taxi driver to deviate at all from the expected is difficult, so I thought it would be a good excuse to take a walk with Reni after arriving at the orphanage. This time my camera was charged so you can see how cute he looks in his hat. We definitely drew stares on our walk! I think most of the stares were because of Reni's face and the distinctive hat, or maybe the handsome American pushing the stroller. But at least one stare involved his lack of legs. It was so hot that I stopped at a little grocery store to buy a cold water to share, and the lady wouldn't let me pay, telling me it was a gift for the boy. I thanked her and as I turned to leave, I heard her say Shume Kech to her coworker. Very Bad. I think it is the fist act of pity, but we enjoyed the free water!

Reni was asleep by the time we got back to the orphanage. We may need to remember this trick!

Our friend Karri has a special bond with a little girl named Luchia. Luchia has several major facial deformaties, but she seems to be very social. I thought her playing with Karri's hand was precious, so I snapped this picture and the close-up below.

We had heard about Karri's favorite souflachi place before, but today she and a friend from South Africa offered to show it to me. It was a hot walk, but the food was good, and we all three ate our fill for less than $10!

This afternoon went quickly. Reni wanted to be held almost the whole time. The kids and caregivers know his departure is near, and they all want to love on him! I think the kids especially are a little overwhelming to him, and I am tall enough to lift him out of the fray. The hotel is all decked out for a celebration of some sort tonight, so I hope I can sleep through it! Two more sleeps as Ellie would say...

Mommy, do I go to school at NIGHTTIME?

These were Ellie's first words when I came in her room this morning to wake her up for school at 6:15. In spite of arising early and laying things out the night before, I learned a couple of other important lessons for the start of a new school year:

1.) Do NOT try to trim your daughter's bangs the night before. There is enough stress and keyed up emotions without compounding those feelings for both individuals while holding a sharp object! The finished look will indeed NOT be finished. That will have to happen another day.

2.) If your child rocks herself to sleep at night (and has nearly every night since you've known her, especially on nights when you put her down early), do not be surprised that she will wake up with her hair in a tangled, matted MESS. Allow ample time (and detangler spray) the next morning to rectify this situation OR tie up her hair the night before to avoid such problems altogether (that would be much simpler, wouldn't it?).

3.) The bus will not come early on the first day of school. This is good when you remember all of the tasks you forgot to do the night before (like packing a snack or enclosing lunch money). Keeping your child's mind focused on preparing for the upcoming change and bus arrival is important. This will be a challenge when your wait approaches thirty minutes.

4.) Kentucky weather in August is quite muggy. It's best if you put your camera out on the porch immediately upon waking up so the camera can acclimate to the outdoor weather conditions and you can avoid a 'fogged up' lens when the bus arrives.

5.) If you decide to put your camera on the 'timer mode', don't forget to change it back before the bus rolls to a stop at your driveway. Crossing the street with your nervous child while traffic waits is not the time to start fumbling with camera settings.

6.) Pray, pray, pray! Especially when the bus driver calls you back up on the bus (while traffic continues to wait) to calm your crying child who is upset over having to have to wear a seatbelt (I don't think it was the seatbelt that was really upsetting her).

I'm sorry the backpack doesn't do justice to this pillowcase dress Gigi made for Els. I love the pattern on the fabric. There is a drawstring at the neck which ties at the shoulder. I wish they made clothes like that for grown ups!

Ellie wanted to make a goofy face for the camera. This is what she supplied.

Here is the shot taken on timer mode. I would have rather gone without this photo to have better photos of the bus, but we wanted one of both of us for Daddy.

Pray for the Taufers in Nepal...

Last week on the day that Ellie and I were returning to the States, Jed and Vicki Taufer (of Morton) were flying from central Illinois to Nepal to meet their daughter Nima (one month older than Reni). Upon their arrival they learned that the US State Department issued a moratorium on visas for Nepali adoptees.

Here is a link to their current situation

Please be in prayer for them and the other 10-12 families and orphans caught in the middle of this heartbreaking situation, that our governement would allow them to finish the process they began 2.5 years ago. We can not imagine how devastating it would be to return home with empty arms. If you know anyone in the State Department or can contact your representative or senator, they would appreciate it very much.

More Picture from Tuesday.

I have started a new game with Reni. Each time I come to the orphanage, I 'hide' a surprise in my bag. Reni goes right to the unzipped pocket and pulls himself up to explore.

Today the surprise was a little firetruck. He knew exactly what to do with it and was pushing it around the floor immediately.

This hodgepodge of legos is the everyday set of toys that are available for play. I wanted to get a picture with Reni and the Legos just to remember.

This is why there aren't many other "daily" toys. Today animal and soldier action figures were added to the mix. This Roman soldier didn't make it through the day. I thought there was some irony with the missing legs! :-)

Today another girl left the orphanage. It was sort of a sad departure because she was being sent to the older kids orphanage in town and wasn't leaving to join a family. Cydil, Ellie and I were at the orphanage when she arrived. The story was that her mother was having some trouble and needed for the sisters to care for her for a few days. Her hair needed to be shaved because of lice, but she seemed to be fitting in after her first couple of rough days. I guess the situation has become a little more permanent, so the move to the age appropriate orphanage was needed. It is run by a kind German nun that I have heard refereed to as 'Mother Superior.' The girls in the picture above were the closest to her age and were watching her go. I didn't know what was happening until it was too late to get a picture of her departure, but she carried all of her possessions out in one Wal-mart sack. I am thankful that she will continue to get the love and care she needs. Pray that her mother will be able to care for her again soon.

Reni and I are having a lot of fun, and I am getting more and more anxious to spend 24/7 with him! Any apprehension he had yesterday morning is gone, and he turns to me (or Duzi of course) any time he wants something. Today when Mother Superior came into the room, David Reni was concerned and crawled over to me and asked to be picked up by raising his arms. I am glad to be the one he looks to for comfort!

Tomorrow may be his last full day in the orphanage. I hope to get pictures with DR and each of the Sisters, and begin to say goodbye's and thank you's. I don't think we can ever say thank you enough to these women - Sisters and caregivers. They have loved our son from day one with the love of Christ, and their love has given him a great start to life!

A few pictures...

I didn't realize that my camera battery was dead this morning until I pulled it out for a quick picture, so these photos are actually from yesterday. This morning I decided to take advantage of a little cooler temps and take David for a walk in the stroller. We walked out to the main road and got an Uje Pa Gas (water without gas) and enjoyed it in a little patch of shade we found. As we were finishing up and beginning our trip back, I heard a familiar chant in an unfamiliar location - "Bobbi Reni! Bobbi Reni!" I looked across the busy street to see Duzi and a sister with 10 of the older kids from the orphanage. Apparently I wasn't the only one who thought a walk would be a good idea this morning. They were on their way back, so we waited for them to cross the street and join us for the return walk. There was no anonymity with this group! All the kids wanted to 'help' pull the stroller, and Reni with his hat from Aunt Hannah, looked like a cool dude! More than once, women on the street stopped to pinch his cheeks or give him a kiss. Each time Duzi proudly told them that he was going to America to get legs! :-)


Reni chilled during our walk, but didn't fall asleep. I think he was refreshed though because he was full of energy when we returned. For the first time since we have been here, I left at 11:00 and he wasn't asleep! I think he will nap well when he finally does go down. The camera is charging, so hopefully I will have some new pictures tonight.

Reni enjoyed 'riding' my feet like a horse. Sorry my hairy legs are highlighted here!

A new toy! Reni had some fun with this squishy ball. The pictures don't give his facial expressions justice.

He just discovered he could squish it.

Last Monday in Elbasan - Hopefully!

This morning I arrived back in Elbasan for what will hopefully be the last three nights of hotel stays before returning to Tirana with David Reni. Finding a hotel proved to be a little more of a trick than I thought, so after visiting four other hotels, I ended up back at the Univers Hotel. That is when things really got interesting. I was checked in by two high-schoolers, and I moved in before heading to the orphanage to see Reni. When I got back, I was told my room had been moved because "an Italian" wanted my room. That wouldn't have been too bad except I was moved from a pretty nice room to a real sketchy room. The price list on the back of my new room's door included hourly and half-day rates! After about 20 minutes in my 'new' room, I came back to the front desk to ask to be moved - again. I was told that it would take a while to clean a new room, so I went to the restaurant for lunch. During lunch I was told two more room numbers, so I didn't know what to expect. Thankfully by the time I was finished with lunch, the kind lady I knew from previous stays here was at the front desk, and she had cleared things up. So now I am in a nice room that if you hold the computer to the right angle to the window you can actually get a wireless signal!

Enough about that. If you are reading this blog you are probably much more interested in what is going on with David Reni. When I arrived this morning there was no electricity at the orphanage, so one of the sisters was sitting with most of the young kids in the hallway. When Reni saw me, he actually turned and crawled away as fast as he could! Of course I was able to catch him, but I really think he was scared at first. We have only been gone about a week with my sickness and everything. I am glad for his sake we didn't have to leave for 6 weeks! Within a few minutes he was laughing and trying to put my sunglasses on. He has been sick and is teething not to mention it is really hot here, so he wasn't his full snuggly self, but even when he just wanted to crawl around, he would always stop every few yards and turn to be sure I was still there and watching. Then I would get his trademark smile, and he would continue his journey.

Cydil took the 'good' camera back to the states, so I only have the point and shoot with me, but I shot some videos on it today that shows David Reni in action! I hope you enjoy!

First Monday back in Wilmore (by Cydil)

Ellie and her new teacher, Mrs. B

It's Day 5 and I declare jet lag officially conquered! I slept later than 5AM for the first time, sleeping in this morning til a whopping 7:00AM. I have to say, traveling with a child is SO much harder to recover from because apparently those hours of missed napping during flights makes a BIG difference. Ellie bounced back much more quickly than I, surprise, surprise!

Nevertheless it's five days home and I can finally see my kitchen table and countertop again. I knew I would have a mountain of mail to comb through, but really. Even after opening and sorting all that mail (and filling an entire kitchen trash can with junk mail and catalogs alone), I had a new list of tasks to complete. Now it feels good to have those bills paid, thank you notes written, phone calls returned, and school supplies purchased. I've also been busy scheduling medical appointments for David Reni and rescheduling some appointments for Nathan due to his delayed return. A new dryer was delivered and installed this morning and yesterday I met with new possible tenants for our duplex. No, life does not stop when you leave home.

Ellie and I are getting ready for the Big Day (Wednesday). On Friday night we visited her new school. The parking lot was a mad house and the school was swarming with hundreds of lost and confused families navigating a new school building (the entire Early Learning Village moved from Wilmore to Nicholasville over the summer). We found help at the nurses station (Ellie found the idea of a "doctor's office" at school completely fascinating, promising the nurse she would come in and lay down on one of the beds when she came back to school). We were shown a map of the building and instructed to look for the blue floor tiles and wall stripes to know we were in the right "pod."

I have to say, we feel so blessed with Ellie's school situation. True to their word, Ellie's pre-school team was able to have their room situated next to Ellie's Kindergarten classroom so they will be close by should her new teaching team need their help in Ellie's transition. (If you saw the size of the school, you would understand how remarkable this is). I still think it's pretty incredible that they would go to such lengths for Ellie -- especially when she wasn't the only student in her former class with special learning needs. This afternoon Ellie's new teacher, Mrs. B, and her new special ed teacher, Mrs. M, visited our home so Ellie could see them again. I've been given all kinds of information about ways in which kindergarten is going to be different than pre-school and feel like I will easily be able to communicate any concerns I have with her teachers.

Thankfully they understand that Ellie is in the middle of a lot of transition right now, both at school and at home. I think it's probably good that this switch to all day kindergarten is starting before bringing David Reni home. I've been vacillating back and forth about this change to all day school for Ellie. After witnessing the learning and growth that took place during our five weeks in Albania, I felt sad about sending her to school and missing her for 8 hours each day. I must admit though, that I then came home and felt the weight of work and began to think of what I could do in those 8 hours and a bit of that sadness dissipated. Overall, I'm beginning to better understand why parents struggle with sending their kids to school.

Today is a "double poster" so scroll down to read Nathan's account of his day in Albania!