Don't be surprised if...

The paper chain is finished  We leave for the airport in a little over an hour.

It has been interesting to hear the children vocalize their thoughts about this impending transition.  Reni has been saying with more frequency that certain details about his life in the States are becoming hazy memories (after all, he was a newly-minted 4 year old when we left).

While our memories are hopefully more keen than his, the more time passes, the more we realize that our time here is making a difference in what we view as normal, changing the way in which we do things, and even altering the ways in which we interact with people.

Before the Waggoners touch down on American soil, we thought we might prepare you for some potentially odd or unusual behaviors as we re-acclimate to our home culture... 

1.)  At that first meeting if Reni pulls back in wariness, that's because Albanians love children and show that love with lots of hair tousling, cheek pinching and kissing. He really dislikes if we've gelled his hair because ironically gel seems to entice even more attention and hair touching, from men and women alike.  After kisses, Reni typically responds with vigorous scrubbing of his cheeks with both palms and hiding behind mom or dad.  He may be Albanian by blood, but he's managed to retain an appreciation for personal space -- which is very American.

I (Cydil), on the other hand, may go in for a kiss. That's because here you greet all fellow female friends with cheek kiss, or kisses on both cheeks.  It was not natural for me at all when we first came but now it's second nature.  If I start, spare me embarrassment and just go with it.

2.) If we show up at your home and kick off our shoes at the door.  It's a Turkish custom here, but also extremely practical.  We live in a village with livestock that regularly pass by our front gate. Enough said.

 3.)  If we are barely in the door and our kids ask, "Where's the candy?"  That's because we have visited a lot of Albanian homes (about 50 in just the past 8 months alone) and without fail, we are offered a piece of candy from the crystal candy dish practically before our seats have hit the couch.  I don't know where this tradition started, but it might be why the candy business is a thriving industry here.

4.) The next question they will ask is if your children speak English.  That's because they are desperately seeking companionship with peers that they can understand and peers who understand them. It's not unusual to meet adults who speak English, but Albanian kids?  That's another story.

5.) When you offer the kids water to drink they may answer, "Without gas, please." That's because all drinking water here is sold with gas or without, and you are expected to specify when you order.  None of this sophisticated "sparkling" or "still" stuff.

6.)  If my children express surprise that you don't live behind a wall or a gate, it's because they've not seen such a thing in two years.

Our village, circa 2003

7.) If Ellie asks if she can go feed your chickens or catch some lizards she is just anxious to go outdoors to play.

8.)  If we're spending the night, we might ask where you keep your candles and headlamps.  Or if we needed to plug in the hot water tank for your guest bath.  It'd be a shame to take a cold shower just because we were too polite to ask.  And if the power goes out and knocks out the nightlight, we'd hate to wake up the whole house while we were stumbling around to find the bathroom.  After all, it went out three times last night as we were attempting to load our carry-ons.

9.)  Don't be startled if at breakfast Ellie and Reni express surprise that your milk is not in a box and think that it's perfectly normal to keep such boxes stored in a cupboard or on a shelf.

10.) If they ask why you stuff your dirty dishes in a cabinet instead of the sink they may have forgotten what a dishwasher looks like.  That's because because space and/or electrical tension constraints have meant two years of washing dishes in the sink, with a rinse basin because our hot water tank holds a limited supply of hot water for rinsing.

Raising our son a little counter-culturally.  Here this is most definitely a woman's job!

11.)  If you catch us rubbing your towels on our face and inviting each other over to feel how soft they are, it's the result of two years of nothing but line-dried laundry. We love the clothes line right outside our window, but line-dried towels sometimes feel like a cross between cardboard and sandpaper!

12.) If the kids might offer to take your trash as we leave to run errands,  that's because our village has no dumpsters (and unlike some of our neighbors, we don't burn our trash) so we take it to a dumpster, usually at the supermarket shopping center on the way to Tirana.  Believe me, it feels real classy to open your hatch back and pull out trash just before grocery shopping.

13.) If Ellie asks for 'small lek' for the shopping cart, it is because all shopping carts are locked together until a 100 lek coin (about $1) is inserted.  Don't worry, we get our coin back if we return the cart.  I don't know why Wal Mart doesn't adopt this system.  It seems to me like it would eliminate all those stray carts rolling around the parking lot from customers too lazy to push them back to the cart return.

the new, fun cart at the supermarket warranted a photo!

14.)   If our kids beg and plead for us to leave them at the Play Place while we go shopping elsewhere, don't think we're bad parents! That's because someone came up with this genius system where you can leave your kids and phone number at a Play Place with paid caretakers while you go and complete your shopping in peace.  My kids have never enjoyed shopping more!

And if Ellie can't remember your name, and makes up a new one instead?... Well, that's just Ellie.

Thanks folks, for your understanding as we navigate this transition from our new home to our old home!  See you in America!