Another Cultural Stumble

Nearly two and a half years into life in Albania and the learning continues.

The other night I was at our friends' home in Tirana.  Nathan was speaking at a church service and rather than ask the kids to sit through their third Albanian service in 24 hours, I thought they would enjoy the treat of seeing some American friends whom they hadn't seen since well before Christmas.  

The grown-ups were on the couch in the living room while the kids played upstairs.  I remarked about their family photo hanging over the fire place, asking where they had it printed and framed.  

My friend answered with the name of a nearby store then added, "They did great, except the guy re-cropped the photo."

My ears perked up.  What did she say?

In my opinion, photo cropping is reserved for the artist or client. Cropping can change the whole story of an image.  It directs the focus of the picture and can change the perspective of the viewer.  How a photographer chooses to crop an image is entirely personal and unique to the photographer's personal style and artistic approach.

The printer changing the cropping of the image is not unlike the server deciding the chef's food wasn't good enough the way it was plated before delivering it to the table, then adding elements to or removing items from the dish.

If I had taken the portrait of my friend's family that was arbitrarily altered... well, I'll just say I would have been perturbed.  

My friend continued, "Yeah, he re-cropped the photo so [my husband] would be in the center of the image, instead of the center falling in between us. You know, here the man of the house is supposed to be in the center of every portrait."

I gulped, thinking of the 50+ family pictures I took last year in our village.  How had I not known about this local "rule" of portraiture?  

I think I have a slightly more egalitarian approach to posing my subjects, not to mention I try to follow rules of symmetry, framing (like the "rule of thirds") and practice complementary posing to help the subjects look like the best version of themselves.  

Undoubtedly I had broken this other rule MANY times.  

Was this a big deal?  Had I unknowingly offended the heads of nearly household we visited? 

As foreigners, we are given passes when we unwittingly create cultural blunders.  But as foreigners, we are outsiders and that's not a place we want to remain.  We want to earn the right to move closer into the center of the circle, to have a seat at the table, to be heard.  Breaking unspoken rules only serves to remind everyone of the outsiders we are.

Unfortunately, as Americans living in an honor/shame culture, we have also learned that we will rarely be told when we are making mistakes.  This doesn't help in our desire to adjust our behaviors into culturally appropriate ways.

I'm pretty sure this will not be the last time we break a 'rule'.  Next time it won't be failing to frame a photo around the head of the household, but something else entirely.  Hopefully we won't have to wait so long to find out!