The Ultimate "Gotcha" Day

In adoption circles ‘gotcha’ days are a day of celebration.  That is the day that the pursuit pays off!  It’s the day the paper chase becomes a memory.  It’s the day it’s official -- a new son, a new daughter is in arms and part of the family!  It marks a new beginning.



Just changed into new clothes, preparing to leave the orphanage forever, December 19, 2006

summer 2010

The excitement of a Gotcha Day is sometimes pretty one-sided through.  Ellie cried, or should I say ‘screamed,’ the entire three-hour van ride to Tirana.  Reni was up crying every 15 minutes that first night. We ached for them as they felt they were losing all that was familiar and any sense of control their little hearts thought they had. They didn’t know they were leaving an orphanage for a home.  They didn’t understand that their status had been changed from orphan to daughter and son. They didn’t know that they had a new inheritance and even a new citizenship. To their understanding, the status quo was where they were comfortable. Remaining hidden in an orphanage was preferable to change.

About 2,000 years ago this weekend the disciples felt much like Reni and Ellie on their first day out of the orphanage. They were hiding together, mourning the loss of the status quo. Before his death, Jesus tried to explain it to his disciples in his last night before his death.

 John 14:3

 “I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.” John 14:18

“If anyone loves me, he will keep my word, and my Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him.” John 14:23 

All the disciples saw was that Jesus was taken from them. Through crippling fear they mourned the loss of their status quo.

Even after finding the tomb empty, they didn’t get it and tried to return to what they knew.

^… for as yet they did not understand the Scripture, that he must rise from the dead. Then the disciples went back to their homes. John 20:9-10 emphasis mine

But Mary stayed and wept. She didn’t understand yet either.

“Woman, why are you weeping?” asked the angels. They knew what had happened!

“Woman, why are you weeping? Whom are you seeking?” asked Jesus. Knowing her broken heart and that she was seeking him!

She still didn’t recognize what had happened. But then Jesus called her by name.

“Mary.”

She suddenly saw clearly! This is exactly what she was seeking! There was no more need for weeping. It was time to rejoice! Mary wanted to hold on, but Jesus had something surprising to say.

¹⁷ Jesus said to her,“Do not cling to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father; but go to my brothers and say to them, ‘I am ascending to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.’” ¹⁸ Mary Magdalene went and announced to the disciples, “I have seen the Lord”—and that he had said these things to her. John 20:17-18 emphasis mine

For the first time in the book of John, Jesus called his disciples ‘brothers’!

For the first time in the book of John, Jesus used the words ‘your Father’!

Relationships had changed! No longer was Jesus just a friend and teacher, He was now a brother. God was no longer ‘the Father’ he was their father!  Upon Christ’s death and resurrection, an adoption had taken place! It was official! God’s pursuit paid off!  It was the ultimate “Gotcha Day”!

Afternoon at the Museum

On Saturday we promised the kids an afternoon visit to "the city."  Apparently Reni is NOT a country boy, which he finds quite dull, at least in the winter.  We decided to check out the new riverfront museum in Peoria.  There were lots of exhibits to get their hands on.  I was particularly interested in them seeing the Plantarium, which was included in the price of general admission.

(below)  Reni!  Let's play "MRI!"  (Seriously, I didn't make that up)

Now, why don't you play, "Name that Waggoner!"

Bits and Pieces -- Camera Phone Dump





I love how my Scottish (that's properly pronounced, Scaw-ish) friends say "bits and pieces" instead of the way we say "stuff" or "things".  It has a more refined sound, don't you think?  Besides, if I titled this post, "Miscellanea", I think you'd yawn and click on the big red "X" in the corner of your window.

 

I have a bunch of little items to share that won't get their own post, so sadly, they're getting lumped altogether because WE ARE LEAVING TOWN IN SIX DAYS! 

 

While I was in Albania, Nathan sent me this photo of the kids -- Ellie's idea of heaven: sitting on Nonna's lap reading books!

 

The next photo gave me a big lump in my throat:

Reni, sedated, for an MRI of his left leg.  Remember the post where we thought Reni might have to have surgery before we left for Albania?  The surgeon wanted another peak at what might be developing below Reni's femur and discovered a knee cap, ligaments, tendons, and two bones!  At the least, we're hopeful that there might be enough in the future to trigger a robotic knee.  A follow-up consultation in Lexington is scheduled for May...

 

Below -- two kiddos up way past their bedtime to see Mom, Gigi, Gyshe, and Aunt Hannah step off the plane!

 

As close as any child of ours will ever come to catching a fish.  Thanks, Bass Pro!  (Where our family goes for cheap fun -- we just browse!).

I laughed when I saw this because yes, Ellie has the gift of making friends in a heartbeat.  Again, another pic while I was overseas...

In January we visited our friends, the Rascos, in Boone.  Arthur had created a 14-minute video of their adoption story which was viewed at a film festival where a distribution company requested a slightly longer version.  That's now available for purchase or download here: https://www.visionvideo.com/detail.taf?_function=detail&a_product_id=36749&refurl=/search_by_ncs.taf?%5Ffunction%3Dnew%26name%3DNew%2520Releases

Before we left their home, they gave us a copy which we were able to watch a few days later with some friends who themselves had completed two Russian adoptions.  Grab a kleenex!  Adoption stories get me every time!

Speaking of adoption, I've got a new blog I'm hooked on.  It's called "Unleash the Sheep".  I see you raising your brow quizzically.  Maybe like me you thought it had something to do with the fact that the author and her husband are vets, but no.  It's better than that. 

I met Sarah online in November.  She and her husband discovered their soon-to-be son, Zefi (isn't THAT a cool name?), on a waiting child list.  Zefi was from this little country called Albania, in a town called Elbasan.  After some internet searching for Elbasan Albania adoption, Sarah stumbled onto our little blog and was shocked to find a photo on here of Zefi!!  We've exchanged a number of e-mails, with me trying to share about what they could expect from their time in Elbasan, where to stay, places to eat, etc., with me eventually connecting them to our friend, Kerri, Elbasan's best hostess and emissary.

ANYWAY, Sarah started blogging shortly before their departure a few weeks ago.  Like you, I was trying to understand the meaning behind the name of their blog until I read the back story.  In preparation for their travel, Sarah had purchased an English to Albanian language CD.  Her young kids were listening to the CD and started repeating "unleash the sheep!"  Puzzled, she skipped back and discovered that what they heard as "unleash the sheep" was really "English and Albanian" or Anglisht dhe Shqip (with the proper accent, it sounds something like "ongleesht the sheep").

Perhaps only someone who has ever been to Albania and heard the Albanian accent can fully appreciate the humor in that, but I thought it was brilliant, on so many levels.  As Sarah wrote, imagine what would happen if all of Jesus' sheep were unleashed and fulfilling His purposes in the world?

Read the Waller family's unfolding adventure as they endeavor to bring Zefi home.  I'm sure they'd appreciate your prayers as they go to court on Tuesday, as well as they try to overcome some difficulty in getting Zef's visa to come home.

Well, I had more to share, but it's going to have to wait for another post!  While I'd love to share some interesting stuff I've been reading, what we are most anxious to post is an idea we need to develop a bit more first. Hint: it's related to building our prayer team,or AKA Team Epaphras! (puzzled?  read our March newsletter here).  Stay tuned!

Paint the Town ... Eggshell

I've been home from Albania two weeks, and they've positively flown by.  We leave in a week for our trip out east and I can't even wrap my mind around that yet! In this interim we've been catching up on office work, working on scheduling appointments for our road trip, but we've also been doing odd jobs here and there to help cover some of our bills since we aren't drawing a salary just yet.  Today we jumped back into painting my grandparents' home, which is to be put on the market soon, now that they've moved to assisted living. 

We had some enthusiastic helpers the first day... who we discovered were under the mistaken impression that they would actually get to paint too... with real paint.  We let them play with unused rollers and brushes and it entertained them for a bit (long enough to get a few photos).

Me: Look at Mommy and smile!  Look and Mommy and SMILE!  LOOK at MOMMY and SMILE!!!  Oh, forget it!

I'm painting you, Mommy!

Thankfully, Gigi and Gjyshe have been helpful babysitters because there's definitely a productivity correlation when the kids are around (as great as they are for blog pics). ;-)

Snowy Palm Sunday

 

 

 

Happy Palm Sunday!  Looking forward to Holy Week ...

A Visit From the Raging Perfectionist (and her family)

The Jenkins cousins

I know it's been an unusually cold start to spring, but no, we do not actually have snow on the ground (yet -- they're calling for 5-7" on Sunday!). These photos were actually taken at the beginning of the year when my cousin Dallas and his family came down from Elgin for a visit.  In spite of the fact that the images may be a bit past their 'best by' date, the pics were too fun not to share -- especially as we realize that family visits will be much more rare in a few months!

You'll have to read all the way to the bottom to understand the title of the post...

There's plenty to do outdoors on the farm!  Especially when there's snow!

(above) can you see the snowball in the air just flung by Reni?  It hits its target and he's pretty happy about it.  Thankfully, Max is a good sport and laughed just as hard as Reni!

You want to know who first introduced the idea of international adoption to Nathan and I? 

It was Dallas and Amanda, back in June of 2004 ...  God knew the idea would be best coming from family first.

We were thrilled when they were finally able to fulfill their dream of adoption when they brought home their youngest, Max, from Thailand in 2011.

And for my Aunt Dianna... tractor pics of Sam and Maya

Max, Elle, and Ellie (below)

It was fun to surprise Grandpa and Grandma Whiteford at their new home in assisted living.  The management was genius to install a freezer stocked with fudge and ice cream bars -- a sure fire way to guarentee the grandkids come back to visit again! 

It was such a treat to have the Jenkins' visit and see our kids get acquainted in the same house where Dal and I have so many memories of spending time together when we were their ages.  Thankfully the gigantic old barn and corn crib where we Dallas engaged in some of our more daring play are no longer standing so we didn't have to worry about the kids ... :-)

Now for the title of the post... we are super proud that Amanda is about to have her first book, "Confessions of a Raging Perfectionist,"  published by Tyndale and available for purchase on May 1 

[from Amazon] "Amanda is a raging perfectionist. She begins each day with a long list. “Keep the house picked up; limit myself to two Diet Cokes; spend special time with each of the kids; work out; pray; avoid sugar; read a chapter in a book about something very important; read my Bible; call my mom.” She determines each day’s worth, and ultimately her own, by keeping track of her stats—pounds gained or lost, stuff accomplished.

That is, until God spoke into her life, waking her up to the true costs of her addiction to perfection. Confessions of a Raging Perfectionist is more than Amanda’s confession; it’s a journey of letting go of the subtle but destructive idols  (emphasis mine) of her overactive inner voice and replacing them with God’s truth. Amanda hopes her journey can inspire others to let God dig in to their own lives, uncovering the subtle lies we unconsciously live by."

Until I read a preliminary draft of the book over a year ago, I wasn't aware of Amanda's struggles (though if one's honest, we're all pretty good at hiding them).  I think most women will identify with what Amanda shares in each chapter, especially today while we live in this world of Pinterest, Facebook, Instagram and Twitter where we're regularly bombarded with images of the beautifully decorated home, the picture-perfect children, the healthy meals, and the hand-crafted gifts that every woman our age seems able to accomplish while maintaining a happy family and successful career. I also appreciate that each chapter concludes with discussion questions, making it good for use in small groups or mentoring relationships.  You WILL enjoy it!

So there.  I had "The Raging Perfectionist" visit my home.  ;-)  If you'd like to get to "know" Amanda a little better, we set up a blog while she was here:  http://www.ragingperfectionist.com/ .  Enjoy!
.

Anna and Abby are coming to Albania!

*updated

photo by Beth Crist

Have we shared the news?  Anna and Abby are coming to Albania with us!

Well, it's not really NEW news, but we're excited nonetheless!  These fantastic girls are going to be college graduates in May -- Anna in Media Comm and Abby in Art Ed.  We've known them both for ages and couldn't believe our ears when they approached us about the possibility of coming over to teach Ellie and Reni while Nathan and I take language classes.  At first we thought it would be for one semester, then they asked if they could stay for the entire school year!  We had to think about it for a whole two seconds (actually less) before we said YES!!

Photo by Beth Crist

I don't even know where to begin in describing this blessing!  Anna regularly babysat for us as well as served on our student cabinet.  Abby was a regular at Global Cafe`, went to Haiti with Nathan, and joined us for lunch every week.  Both have had extended experience overseas, love Jesus, and have great servants hearts.  We have so many ideas for ways to plug them into the village ministries, I hope we don't overwhelm them!

I wanted to share the news here on the blog for another reason though.  While most of you probably don't know them, you know us.  You know that Ellie's learning needs combined with Reni's mobility issues don't permit us to simply enroll them in Albanian public school, much less the international school in Tirana.  Our plan from the start was to home school them, but we had no idea what we would do for child care during language school except for us to alternate going to class (which could potentially extend the length of time before we move to the village).  

photo by Beth Crist

By Abby and Anna coming, they will be able to provide much needed help with the kids, not only by providing childcare, but fresh new voices in their 'classroom!'  Nathan and I will be able to plunge head first into language learning (our biggest investment in our future effectiveness) as well as have a bit more time to get our feet under us as we integrate into the Planters team and set up our systems for ministry.

Would you consider helping us by helping Abby and Anna?  They will only be able to stay as long as their funding holds out!  I calculated that if everyone who visits our blog over the course of the month could give $25, it would cover half of their combined expenses for 9 months.  Of course, I don't want you to feel any guilt or obligation on your part, but if God has blessed you and you are looking for a way to bless others, a gift to Anna and Abby would be a big blessing to US!

If you would like to get to know them better, they have set up a facebook page: http://www.facebook.com/AbbyAnnaAlbania?fref=ts

They have also been embarking on some creative fundraising projects, including selling oil paintings, prints, and cards. Here is Abby's site:  http://abigaillecompte.wix.com/painting

Gifts to them may be sent to World Gospel Mission, Attn: VIA Coordinator, PO Box 948, Marion, IN, 46952.  Please include a note that your gift is to be credited to Abby LeCompte and/or Anne Leon.
OR
You can contribute online at: www.wgm.org/leon (Anna) or www.wgm.org/LeCompte (Abby)

Thanks for reading this all the way through!  Gratefully,  Cydil

Published!

"Adoptive Families, the award-winning national adoption magazine, is the leading adoption information source for families before, during, and after adoption."

If I had time for a hobby -- digital scrapbooking (or more accurately, album design) would be it.  Every year my list has included designing our family's year in review book.  (I'm behind 6 years -- but I have made my share of wedding albums and smaller books as gifts.)  There is something satisfying about seeing one's digital images bound and in print form.

In early January an e-mail popped up in my box.  From the Adoptive Families editors, it requested samples of various books parents had made documenting their child's entrance into their forever families.  Of course I had more important things to do (a-hem), but on a whim I pulled out Reni's adoption book and snapped some images and e-mailed a few low-res pics away.

A couple of weeks into our travels south I got an e-mail request for reprint permission and the hi-res files!  Problem was, I had copied the files onto my desktop back in Illinois... then I had the thought to look through my memory cards and found the originals there!  I sent those off and didn't hear a word whether or not they would be used, until a month later when I was on my way to the airport to go to Albania when my friend Amy texts me.

"Just got our Adoptive Families magazine and Essie yelled, 'It's Reni!'"
Her text was accompanied by a pic of the page spread.

When I came home, there was a copy of the latest issue in my mailbox where I could read the article in its entirety. It gives a lot of practical advice for parents on everything from the types of photos to take on an adoption trip, to software programs for photo editing and book design, to publishing/binding manufacturers.

For those of you interested, I design my photo books in a software called FotoFusion (which I also use for the collages you frequently see here).  I can't say enough how much I love this intuitive software which I use for everything from albums to postcards to collage prints, posters, invitations, and more.  For publishing my photobooks and albums, some of my favorite companies include Shutterfly (for economy),White House Custom Color (medium to high quality), and Zookbinders (high quality to heirloom albums).

If you are curious to see the books I created for both children's adoption trips, click on the links below:

Reni's Book

Ellie's Book

If you are an adoptive family -- I know it's a lot of work to create something like this.  I'm so glad we did because in the early months looking at their books, it was interesting to see what images triggered memories for Ellie and Reni. Now, when we look at their books, different photos will unexpectedly lead to stories about our trip or their life before being in our family -- it's an excellent conversation starter (especially for Ellie) whenever she has questions about her adoption.

Thanks, Adoptive Families, for including us in your article!  What a special treat to be featured in a national publication!

Albania Trip Recap

A few months ago, this trip wasn't on my radar, but when I heard its purpose, I couldn't imagine NOT going!  What an investment it could be in our future in Vlashaj!  Nine days without Nathan and the children gave me lots of time to think, however our time was short and I had limited access to internet, so I wasn't able to blog my thoughts at the time. Now I'm home and jet lag has given me some quiet early morning hours to share some of those thoughts here...

The trip started out with an unexpected 24 hour layover in Chicago ... that led to meeting a beautiful woman.

We had a very busy first day in Albania, frantically assembling everything from storage that we would need in the village, purchased produce at the market, and stopped at QTU for everything else for the eight ladies who would join us for the next week.  The lights went out twice, but eventually we had bedding on ten beds (by "on", we really mean that we had a stack of bedding on each bed) and fires in the stoves and were off to the airport to welcome our guests at 7:30pm.

view to the east of Maminas, Vlashaj and Marikaj and the autostrada to Tirana

I met Sue (far right) eight years ago when Nathan and I attended the first Global Impact Celebration at The Family Church.  It was a joy to get to know her better this past week.  I so appreciated her wisdom and maturity as a team leader.  She started the week with an excellent devotional message, walking through the book of Nehemiah, giving context to our theme verse from Nehemiah 8, "...the joy of the Lord is our strength."

One of the aspects to the trip that appealed to me most was the fact that we would be visiting homes of as many attendees as possible prior to the retreat.  I couldn't imagine a better way to get to know the ladies of the community than to see where they lived and learn about their families.  I loved how this woman below, though not a participant in any of the programs at the Center, saw us admiring her daffodils as we passed by and picked several for us.

At one of the homes we visited, our hostess was so sweet to tell me that when we move to the village, she will send her daughters over to meet me when they are in town to see her so that I can make some friends my age.  How sweet was that?

The Wednesday night women's meeting met around the ping pong table.  Shpresa shared that many of the ladies have seemed content to come and hear teaching from her, but she's struggling to encourage them in their own personal study and growth in between meetings. We shared that some issues are universal...

Two ladies on the team are skilled nurses (Sue is a nurse practioner).  They solicited several donations of medical supplies and delivered them to Mira, the village nurse, at the clinic a few doors down the street.  Sue was particularly excited to deliver an otoscope. This will be a much-used tool!  I love how God uses our talents and gifts and the generosity of others to meet practical needs and tangibly show love.

Eda, Sue, Mira, Emma, and Karen

Communication to and from Albania has changed dramatically over the course of the last 20 years!  My freshman year of college (and a few years beyond), I would hear from mom and dad every few weeks via fax machine (not even phone).  Eventually we moved up to prepaid cards for 8-minute phone chats now and then .... after spending 5-minutes typing in the 32-digit PIN, at least a couple of times, until you got it right. :-)

While we didn't have internet in Vlashaj this trip, wherever we went that had wifi, several women on the team whipped out their iPhones and within seconds could Facetime with family!  No clunky desktop computer, restricted to one place, no bulky headset and microphone, no waiting to catch a loved one at home... Yes, we will appreciate much easier communication with "home" when we settle there.

It was a special treat to connect with my friend, Kerri! She took the bus in from Elbasan to meet me for lunch on Tuesday.  I appreciate having a friend who's been-there-done-that in missions!  She has so much wisdom and experience and a generous heart!  We are blessed to call her friend!

The day we were stranded in Chicago an e-mail arrived on my phone from B.  She and her husband had just gotten custody of their son, G, from the Vlore orphanage that Ellie called home until she was ours.  How do we get him to drink?  How do we get him to chew and swallow food? I fought tears as I recalled our early struggles in dealing with Ellie's institutional behaviors and delays.  I was also reminded again that what she endured wasn't just something I have manufactured in my imagination, that's been exaggerated as time and distance have increased.  Oh how my heart hurts that children still endure those conditions.  (And it doesn't sound like a thing has changed).

On Tuesday evening I was able to meet B's family in person!  The Bethany house parents, Bob and Cathy Watanabe, hosted us for dinner and we were able to chat about our mutual experiences.  This is the first family I've known in six years to have adopted a child from this orphanage!  How sweet was it that we overlapped in Albania?  Given that they live on the west coast, I don't know that our paths would have ever crossed anywhere else!  I look forward to seeing how G flourishes in the safe and loving arms of a family!

At the last possible moment, my youngest sister Hannah was able to join us on this trip.  For Hannah, it's been at least four years since she's been to Albania.  It was a joy to see her visit places and get reacquainted with old friends.

It's given that our weak American stomachs can't handle the tap water in the village (or the city, for that matter).  Nathan has been talking for months about our need to find a water filtration system to save us the money of buying all of our drinking water.  Low and behold, Sue (a frequent traveler to Haiti) brought a filtration system for the team that she had used on a previous missions trip and donated it to our family!  Hurray!  Jenna demonstrates it below!

Whenever Mom and Dad host a team, they take them to an historical site in Durres rich with meaning for those of us who follow Christ.  It really puts a lot of things into perspective, especially at the beginning of a missions trip. Lest I spoil the surprise for those of you who plan to visit us, I'll just share a few snapshots below... :-)

What a fantastic group of ladies!  I'm so glad to now call them friends!  What a privilege it us for us when others take the time out of their lives to come and serve and leave a piece of their hearts in Albania.  We love and appreciate you, women of TFC!

Finally, it was a rich blessing to once again visit Albania with my mom and dad, and see how much they are dearly loved by those whom they've been called to serve.  Nathan and I are stepping onto a strong foundation, laid by their years of work and sacrifice.  Many doors are open to us because of their testimony.  Whenever I sense fear rise up, I'm reminded that we are not breaking completely new ground.  The hard top soil has been broken up, and seeds have already been planted. Thank you, Mom and Dad!  Thank you, Lord!